Monday, March 30, 2015

What if the tables were turned.

If there is ONE thing the combo of ministry and special needs has taught me its to ask this question.

What if the tables were turned?

There is just so much benefit to asking that question! There is so much GRACE when life is viewed through that question! There is less judgement, more thought, less fighting and more understanding, less hurt feelings and more compassion.

When my feelings get hurt... When I get frustrated about something...When I think someone handled something poorly....If I can just stinking remember to ask myself.... What if?

What if I were the friend with the abled body kids? Would it be hard for me to always go to their house because I knew it was easier on them? Would it be hard to know that every outing with them was so much more work then an outing with another friend? Would it be worth it to me to try to offer encouragement and possibly offend? Would I want my kids to sit on the sidelines to play instead of getting their energy out at the park? Would it be worth the relationship to me when I knew the closer we got the more burden I would be expected to help carry? 

What if?

I hope you can ask yourself the same questions... What if you were the one with the kid in the wheelchair? Would you go to the park because its where kids want to play even though you didnt if it would end up in tears or possibly cause your child hurt? Would you allow people to get close to you? Would you voice your needs and accept help?

What if?

This doesn't just apply to wheelchairs and crutches and autism and abled body kids. These thoughts can I apply to everything. If only I would remember. Unfortunately doesn't happen as often as I wish...
What if I were military and left all the friends I made? Would I get close to people? Would it be hard to see my friends I left continuing on without me? What if I had twins? (I mean do I even need to add to that, heavens.) What if our future as a family looked very unclear? What if I didn't know if the next bill would be paid? What if my friend always seemed to be in the spotlight would I still support them?  What if I were the successful friend would I be understanding when friends were somewhat quiet about the success? What if I were the pastor's wife that was discouraged? What if my marriage was falling apart would I be honest and seek help? What if my child had cancer would I show up for every service and always have cheerful facebook posts? What if you just had the worst mom fail ever? What if I wanted to be a stay at home mom but my family needed me to work? What if I went to work everyday and came home to a grumpy wife? What if I was home with kids every day and an exhausted husband came home? What if my husband had cancer? What if I planned on going on a trip with my husband and at the last second couldn't go?

What if?

It's such a small question? Such a small thought when you really get down to it. Its not hugely significant but I do think it can be life changing. When I get frustrated, when I get bent out of shape, when my feelings just get hurt......If I could just remember to ask myself....If I could just mentally put myself on the other side......We can be so quick to judge what other's should do or shouldn't do or feel and shouldn't feel...

what if that were me? what if that was my reality? what would I want?  I tell you what no matter what I'd want a big ol dose of GRACE.

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