Can I just say sometimes I am not the perfect mom! I know it just shocks all of you to hear that! : ) But really sometimes I feel so far from it.
Yesterday Toby got to watch his mommy throw a bonafide temper tantrum. I write about this not because I'm proud or think its cute, but because I like to be super honest on all the aspects of my life with Toby.
We are really working on independence with Toby. Trying to get him to walk down hill on our driveway to go up to the van door, open it and then climb in, get in his seat, turn around and get buckled in (he can unbuckle just not quite buckle) Well, imagine trying to do this with a walker with four wheels and being three years old and trying to control yourself going down a slope. Doesnt really work out well. Well, for some reason lately Ive been getting hurt constantly by that walker. And as most of my friends know I have extremely low pain tolerance. To put it mildly. The other day he slammed his walker on the top of my foot and I ended up getting one nasty bruise on my foot. Well this day in particular he wasnt wanting to do ANYTHING himself. So he started being whiney about getting in the vain. Well, in all his complaining and worry he rammed his walker right into my shin. I immediately got super ticked off as I felt the large knot form and the almost instant bruise come into view. I totally lost my temper with him and got frustrated. In my head I was hating my life, hating his walker, and just hating the daily little struggles. I had a down right pitty party, bad attitude temper tantrum. Luckily most of what I was thinking wasnt coming out of my house. Nate, (My husband) who was sitting quietly in the front seat watching all this would have been shocked I'm sure. (or maybe not) Anyway, immediately I realized how wrong I was. It wasnt anyone's fault. Things happen. I should love that walker. I should kiss the people's feet of whoever invented that walker. That walker makes it where Toby CAN walk. A year ago Toby had a walker but never used it. I should be thankful that I have a son who is walking and using his walker at all. So much has changed this past year and if my biggest problem is having some big ugly bruises then hey I think (in hindsight) that's a pretty good trade off if you ask me!!